Science has failed to solve a number of worldly mysteries, perhaps the most notable being the complete inability to find a reliable cure for hangovers. Westerners may not realize the seriousness of hangover cures due to our comparatively slack work habits. You know, us English speakers toss back brews on the weekends like superstitious people throw salt over their shoulder. That’s because we don’t work the next day. Or if we do, we call in sick. For the Japanese, however, being hungover is no excuse for calling in sick. Especially for Saturday work. Saturday work just means you weren’t productive enough during the week, so you just gotta work even harder! That’s why science needs to step up and cure the hangover.

What’s Being Said

I found this article on my Twitter feed. Originally written in 2007, it got picked up recently by a blog search engine and has seen some popular resurgence. The original Japanese is here: http://am6.jp/94S087

Curing Hangovers and 12 Ways to Prevent Them

So you drink a ton and wake up the next day with your head killing you. You’ve had this experience, right? Now you can do something about that harsh hangover, as brought to you by Ono’s Blog. These are things that I’ve heard about and tried, but of course there could be more ways.

• Run hot water over your head.
• Drink Heparize. (It seems to be a liver enzyme in a bottle. Yum!)
• Puke.
• Stay vertical…just keep standing.
• Brush your teeth before going to bed.
• Don’t exercise after drinking.
• Drink a lot of water.
• Sleep.
• Take a digestive aid.
• Take a long, warm bath.
• Get a massage.
• Breathe deeply.

…

Everybody can get overwhelmed by drinking, but if you follow these instructions, you can have a great drinking life!

Maybe it’s cultural differences, but I think the only effective one here is drinking water. OK, not working out after drinking and sleeping are good suggestions, too. But really, who doesn’t want a bath and massage after a night out?